4 Questions to Ponder Prior to Blackburn’s loss to the Red Devils
By: Taylor Rockwell |
1 Comment
1) Will Berbatov’s ass be less fat and lazy against the Rovers?
Yes, I know that Berba had a brace against AAB, and both the goals were pretty and made me squeal with glee and clap like a small child… but not enough to curb my sinking feelings that Berba may be the fattest skinny person in the history of the world. That is, there were countless opportunities for him to get into the box and win a header. Instead, he would pass the ball, watch his teammate run onto it and play deft ball into the box, and then watch it roll harmlessly out of bounds as Berba stood in place and ate a cheeseburger. Lord Ferg must break him of this laziness, or frustration in the ranks will soon begin to mount. Read the rest of this entry »
Category: Manchester United
Champions League Preview - Manchester United vs. Aalborg BK
By: Taylor Rockwell | Add Comments
Matchday Two: Tuesday, September 30
Kickoff: 20:45 (2:45 PM EST)
Location: Energi Nord Arena, Aalborg, Denmark
United will look to get back to winning form in the Champions League against last year’s Danish Superligaen champs. It also looks to be the 4,308th game that will see Anderson play well, and yet still fail to score. Read the rest of this entry »
Category: Manchester UnitedMan Falls Over at Old Trafford - United 2, Bolton 0
By: Simon James | 1 Comment
The headlines wrote themselves this morning for all the wrong reasons. Rob Styles’ itchy whistle finger contrived to invent a new type of offence for awarding a penalty of which he is yet to explain to the media.
It was pretty clear to everyone that it wasn’t a penalty and Styles was spooked by the OT faithful and immediately blew. His view was perfect, it was a sunny clear day, Ronaldo even fell over in instalments. Styles still saw something we all didn’t. Luckily for you and the Offside, I managed to get an interview with Styles as he headed as he hitchhiked home down the M6. He told me he had, at the very moment that the tackle happened, been beamed up by powerful aliens who were betting on the game and they threatened to raze Old Trafford to the ground unless he gave a penalty when he was placed back. Kind of like a alien betting ring futuristic “Pause Live TV”.
So there you have it, very simple explanation, and a damn sight more believable than anything he will ever tell you.
Shame really as the game was pretty good game up to that point and even better after it. Rooney came on and looked like a World Beater again. His link-up play with Ronaldo for his goal was poetry Berbatov played 90 minutes and looked a little quiet save for a few moments of quality, a bit few and far between for me, he needs a performance or at least a goal, I feel. Anderson started again, and was replaced by Scholes who looked very lively when he came on, he was determined to get forward like the Scholes of old. My old mate Park was on for the whole game and I can’t help thinking that he is getting his starts for the start of the season so Fergie can be justified in dropping him after Christmas when the race really starts.
All in all, a competent and encouraging performance that was both convincing and encouraging, I feel that someone is in line for a hammering very soon.
Man Utd: Van der Sar, Neville, Ferdinand, Vidic, Evra, Ronaldo (Nani 80), Fletcher, Anderson (Scholes 71), Park, Tevez (Rooney 71), Berbatov.
Subs Not Used: Amos, Giggs, O’Shea, Evans.
Bolton: Jaaskelainen, Steinsson, Cahill, Andrew O’Brien, Samuel, Davies, Nolan, McCann, Muamba, Gardner (Smolarek 73), Elmander (Vaz Te 66).
Subs Not Used: Al Habsi, Taylor, Joey O’Brien, Riga, Shittu.
Category: Manchester UnitedUnited versus Bolton Wanderers - Preview
By: Simon James | Add Comments
Manchester United v Bolton Wanderers; Old Trafford, Saturday 27th September, 1500.
VdS returns against Bolton after a shaky start to the season with Kuszcak ruled out with a groin injury. There was always a chance United would name rookie keeper Ben Amos in the starting line up but it was felt that thinking man’s neanderthal, Kevin Davies, and the aerial bombardment he will undoubtedly receive, would be too much of a fiery baptism. Possebon won’t make the squad as he has a gash that is healing but fears of a broken leg or ligament damage have now subsided.
Bolton’s Gary Cahill looks return’s after suspension and new record signing Johan Elmander is also in contention for a place. Matt Taylor will miss out with a broken toe.
Manchester United Squad (form DWLD): Van der Sar, Brown, Neville, R Da Silva, Ferdinand, Vidic, Evans, O’Shea, Evra, F Da Silva, Ronaldo, Nani, Hargreaves, Anderson, Fletcher, Park, Giggs, Tevez, Rooney, Berbatov, Manucho, Welbeck, Amos.
Bolton Wanderers Squad (form WLDLL): Jaaskelainen, Steinsson, Cahill, Shittu, A O’Brien, Samuel, Gardner, Muamba, Nolan, McCann, J O’Brien, Smolarek, Elmander, Davies, Helguson, Riga, Hunt, Vaz Te, Cohen, Fojut, Al Habsi.
Category: Manchester UnitedRandom Thoughts Recorded Whilst Watching A Thorough Boro Beating
By: Taylor Rockwell | 2 Comments
Watching a streaming United game broadcast in Arabic is a very, very strange experience.
English is no big deal (unless it’s coming from Tommy Smyth, then it’s instantly muted). Spanish I can handle. But Arabic definitely through me for a loop…. hooray for streaming video right?
Who the hell conducts the draws for the FA Cup and Carling Cup and why do they hate us? Read the rest of this entry »
Category: Manchester UnitedA Gentle Reminder
By: Taylor Rockwell | 4 Comments
I listen to several different football podcasts and try to read as much about the beautiful game as possible (while trying not to get fired from my other job that actually pays me money). In the past few days I have noticed a disturbing trend in the coverage of Manchester United’s newest player, Dimitar Berbatov. So, here is a quick reminder to all United fans whose nails have been chewed to the quick listening to pundits bash the £30.75 million signing: Read the rest of this entry »
Category: Manchester UnitedThe Morning After - Fergie on Possebon, Ronaldo
By: Simon James | 1 Comment
Fergie is understandably very angry with Emanuel Pogatetz for his challenge on Rodrigo Possebon. However, the 19-year-old Brazilian midfielder, who was making his first United start, was taken to hospital, kept in overnight for observation but has now learned there is no break.
“It looked a really bad one. For the kid to make his first team debut and get an injury like that it was pretty horrendous,” said Fergie. “For 10 minutes everyone was numb about it. The thing about these challenges it is always the case that the opponent claims his innocence. One of their bench is out screaming that it wasn’t a sending off and there was nothing wrong with the player. But at least they apologised. Gareth Southgate understood the gravity of it. He was very, very apologetic. But it was a terrible tackle.”
An interesting aside was Fergie’s remarks about Ronaldo’s future. He effectively conceded that it is inevitable that he will leave for Real Madrid, just not yet. The interesting part is that it took another summer meeting to calm Ronaldo down, show him the love and set some conditions for the timeframe of his departure.
Fergie said, “Graeme Souness was right when he said that just as all Italians dream of one day playing for Juventus or the Milan clubs, so southern Europeans want at some point to play for Real Madrid or Barcelona, so I understand what was going on in Cristiano’s mind when he declared he wanted to join Real. But once we had talked, he accepted it was a move for the future. The crowd still chant Cantona’s name so I told Cristiano, ‘Leave a hero like Eric’, and one day he will - but not yet of course.”
Good man management? Damn right it is, but who knows what’s going through Ronaldo’s mind at the moment, he might even be tempted by City?
Category: Manchester UnitedUnited v Boro (nearly) live blog
By: Simon James | 17 Comments
Manchester United 2 - Middlesborough 1
Amos, Da Silva, Vidic, Brown, O’Shea, Nani, Possebon, Anderson, Giggs, Welbeck, Ronaldo
Subs from Zieler, Manucho, Gibson, Tevez, Cleverley, Gray, Eckersley
1st Half
Alves and Brown seem to be having quite a battle.
Welbeck seems to be very lively also.
Downing seems to be their biggest threat.
24 minutes - United, Ronaldo, score with a header. He’s very underrated in the air I feel.
Save from Amos from Wheater header.
40 minutes - Boro seem to have a head of steam for last 10
42 minutes - Ronaldo has shot saved, Da Silva offside anyway.
45+1 minutes - Giggs knocks one over the bar
HALF TIME
United’s team of youth and experience seem to be doing OK.
Whilst you’re waiting for the second half you may want to have a look at this Guardian article, very interesting. Drop in a comment if you want to discuss.
schaafito - PAY ATTENTION IN CLASS! I can’t be held responsible for you failing anything? What class is it?
Arsenal are 5 up at Sheffield United. Their team has an average age of nineteen. N-n-n-n-nineteen. Sorry, couldn’t resist. Swansea beating Cardiff 1-0, Sunderland 1 down to Northampton.
2nd Half
Boro’s Shawky is replaced by Adam Johnson.
46 minutes - United out of traps very quickly with Brad Jones saving from Welbeck.
50 Minutes - Nani has shot blocked by Wheater (he’s having a good season, even though he looks like an Easter Island statue)
53 Minutes - Adam Johson booked for unsporting behaviour. He insulted Da Silva’s landscaping gardening or something.
56 Minutes - DAMN IT, the pesky Adam Johnson pops up to volley home a screamer. Where did that come from?
57 Minutes - schaafito is ejected from class and sent to work in the mines.
60 Minutes - Ronaldo off for Tevez. Come on Carlos, get us a win.
64 Minutes - Seems to be all Boro at the moment. BUT WAIT, Pogatetz is OFF. A shocker of a challenge on Possebon and it’s a straight red. Possesbon has had to go off from that challenge, Gibson coming on. Boro have taken off Digard and replaced him with Riggot.
67 Minutes - Tevez looking lively as usual. He always plays like he’s being watched by his Dad.
68 Minutes - Gibson has a poke but Jones watches it out.
Lots of reaction to the Pogatetz challenge on Possebon, he has certainly broken his leg and it looked like a very deliberate attempt by Pogatetz, we haven’t the last of this. Ugly, very ugly.
77 Minutes - Nani’s shot saved comfortably by Jones.
79 Minutes - GIGGS! The Wonderful Welsh Wizard does it again for United with a lovely lob.
83 Minutes - Giggs off, well worth his money tonight AND MANUCHO ON! YEEE HAAA! Alves off for Emnes. And schaafito it’s Australian Brad Jones in nets for Boro.
86 Minutes - Sustained period of pressure for United, looking more confident now.
89 Minutes - Been quite a good game, Tevez has a bang and is then caught offside.
94 Minutes - Just time for another one! Nani getting on the scoresheet after a massive mistake from Wheater (after I had complimented earlier….)
99 Minutes - A lot of extra time after Possebon injury, we wish him well and a speedy recovery. But finally the ref blow’s it. A good win against a quite experienced side, I’ll take that. Well done United.
A good win marred by a horrific tackle and injury to Possebon. I hope they throw the book at Pogatetz, there is no room in the game for that type of thing. If they do, however, it will simply highlight the FA’s hypocrisy after they failed to deal out a lengthy ban to Newcastle’s Danny Guthrie on Hull’s Fagan.
Bring on Bolton.
Category: Manchester UnitedDrug Dealer Arrested at Anderson’s Home; Karmic Gods are not amused
By: Taylor Rockwell | Add Comments
It appears that suspected drug dealer Richard Alex da Silva Martins ‘Gigi’ was arrested in the Porto Alegre
home of United midfielder Anderson. While Anderson has been cleared of any wrongdoing, I can’t help but feeling that the gods of fate won’t look to kindly on anyone who associates with individuals whose character definition includes the words “notorious” and “drug dealer”.
Thankfully, no other players on United have ever been involved in any drug related offenses. Wait… he did what? Oh… that’s no big deal… I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been scheduled to take a drug test, forgotten, turned off my cell phone, and then gone shopping. A logical excuse if ever there was one.
Category: Manchester UnitedManucho Unleashed?
By: Simon James | 5 Comments
Manucho, the Angola striker named in the Africa Cup of Nations Best 11, could make his Manchester United debut tonight Carling Cup against Boro. I didn’t know too much about him so, to save you faithful readers the trouble, I researched him and have to say I’m looking forward to seeing him have a run out. After United bought him they loaned him out to Panathanaikos due to UK work permit issues. He scored on his debut and Panathanaikos ended up 3rd, qualifying them for Europe. Manucho scored three goals in the six-game mini tournament of the Uefa Cup seeing them go top of their group and qualifying them for the second qualifying round of this years UEFA Champions League. United got a Work Permit for him in the summer but he suffered a fashionable meta-tarsal break making this one of the first available games where he is fit. Still not convinced? Look at this:
Anderson and Nani will also probably be in the squad and I would probably say Cristiano Ronaldo should start if not play a major part. Gary Neville will start at right-back.
Boro look as if they have a striker problem with Mido, Tuncay Sanli and Aliadiere all struggling and unlikely to feature.
I’m hoping for a convincing win tonight set forth the momentum needed for Bolton on Saturday.
United Squad: Kuszczak, Amos, Neville, Brown, R Da Silva, O’Shea, Evans, Gray, Chester, Eckersley, Hargreaves, Ronaldo, Anderson, Nani, Gibson, Hewson, Possebon, Cleverley, Welbeck, Manucho.
Category: Manchester United
Home 
